Searching for "i still love him"


31 Results For 'i still love him'

Saleena

November 18, 2015 @ (Australia )

Tags: broken heart


OK well a few weeks ago a guy broke my heart into millions of pieces and i couldn't do anything about ..... could i ??? honestly i still have hope that we will get back together but in my mind he has made it pretty clear he doesn't like me anymore cause he has a crush on someone else and has successfully started dating her ...But people have different ways of moving on and im just doing it slowly he has his reasons for breaking up with me that i didn't see and still dont know why . This would have been the 2nd time we went out the first time was as good but the 2nd time was better we improved on the things we needed to be improved on and i am still strongly in love with him and its going to take me a while to get over but honestly YES i am ONLY 13 but age is just a number all my friends have told me i will get over it just like he has but i honestly cant he is the only person i want my heart to be broken by. the reason im writing this isn't to show people, i just want to get this out of my head and see if it it sounds as stupid as people think. i don't know why but he has broken my heart twice and every time i haven't been able to hate him or dis like him or love him less than i do i know his feelings are gone and he doesn't like/love me anymore but no matter how hard i try and trust me i have tried these feelings wont disappear but why aren't i surprised this one absolutely amazing guy has taken my heart and cased a spell on me i don't no how to deal with these things im only 13 and i have fallen deeply in love. All my friends think he is an awful person for breaking up with me the way he did which was through my friend on a phone call and obviously i was in tears but it was kind he said he didn't want to do it in person cause he didn't want to see me cry.... which i did in fact cry quite ALOT. i have honestly never cried over a guy besides him both times i have cried when he broken up with me and every single time i always fall for him again why... THIS PAIN that i get every time im around him kills me i struggle some days seeing him smiling and laughing with other girls it makes me notice that he has moved on and he actually deserves a better girl than me i made his life stressful that's all i could give to him not love and comfort but stress. i still love him like seriously who couldn't fall in love with a guy like him he is all i think about every single second minute and hour of the day. know im looking back and the time we shared together, the best days of my high school year was the days i spent with him. If i did show any one this i know they will say im just 13 i will find someone again and all of that, that i have heard PLENTY of times. One of the reasons why i have fallen in love with him is cause when he is with me he is a completely different person he is loving comforting and over all just AMAZING and i feel like a different person, every time we were on the phone would be the most memorable moments, we would talk about the future and what it would be like and all of those amazing things but know that has all gone to waste In one letter he wrote me on our 1 month in the end it said i may hold your hand for a while but you will hold my heart forever and i don't know if that was true but at the time i did believe it and he does and will hold my heart forever. Everything i said to him was true, he may not believe it but its true. I AM TRULY SORRY FOR SCREWING THINGS UP WITH HIM and i hate myself everyday for it that it was my fault he is out of my life likely to be FOREVER and i cant control that. i have made a lot of mistakes in my life but loosing him would be the one that i regret and wish i could change the way things turned out for us but I cant control his feelings and at the moment i cant control my own feelings either at the moment all i do know is that i have fallen deeply in love with this absolutely amazing guy ......
^^^
THAT IS MY STORY


       

Fate

August 23, 2015 @ (NY)

Tags: bad break up toxic love lonely depressed loveless


We started to date back in February and it was long distance, I convinced him to come to my college. He moved into my family house and stayed with me, I had work so he'd stay home with my little sister. Who is 3 years younger than us. He fell in love with her, I told him to please stop being foolish and think about our future plans...when I put all my trust in him I saw he was acting weird and questioned him...only to find out he kissed her...multiple times... we broke up then. And he's been living in my house since, I'm sitting here watching them fall in love while my love was just thrown away like paper. I told him to leave several times but he'd make me feel bad about bring him here and abandoning him. I'm in so much pain. I decide to separate the two and he calls me a bitch and mean names. Sad thing is I still love him I cant throw away 7months like that.


       

Ally Marie

April 26, 2015 @ (Canada )

Tags: sad


My ex boyfriend and I started talking after we had played mw3 with mutual friends. we had never met before. At first it was only just texting like friends and then one night I just randomly told him.. whenever I like someone. I tell them. it kinda comes in handy sometimes. but anyways I said to him "look, I know we've never met and stuff but I kinda like you, I don't want to ruin things if you don't feel the same way so if you don't, let's forget about it." he replied with "only kinda..?" and I'm like "more than that". and he told me he felt the same way. we started dating January 17th 2015. we had been dating for maybe five days and my dad drove me to meet him at the movies. he walked over and shook my dads hand and we went to watch American sniper. he kept looking at me throughout the whole movie and smiling. I was so nervous so I kept biting my lip and giggling quietly. he had his arm around me and he kissed my cheek and my forehead a few times. he was so sweet and caring and I honestly fell in love with him. at the end of the movie. we made out and stuff but I had to leave because my dad texted me. once we got to our own homes we talked all night. he was the best guy I've ever met. I love him still more than I've ever loved myself. March 15 he went on vacation. we barley got to talk that day because he was on the plane. after that. a few days later I texted him saying hey and he just read it. so I just left it. the next day I still hadn't heard from him. not even the next. he would just read my messages. so I finally said "do you want to break up? I feel like you have lost feelings for me." he said no and that was it. on the 20th of March we broke up. he accused me of breaking up with him for saying "would it be best if we broke up because you don't seem happy and you seem distant." he got really mad and was like "wow. so we're over?" I said "no? I'm just asking you. I want to be with you". he just ignored it. so. after that there was a lot of fighting and mind games and he was being very rude and blaming me. we broke up after dating for two months. I know it was a short time but I was in love and he said he was too. now still, to this day. April 26th. we still talk. more so fighting rather than talking. he's put me through so much and I've gone to counselling because it's really hard to cope with it. he's called me so many names and I'm still so in love with him. Yes we are young. I'm turning 14 in June and on March 28th he turned 15. but I still love him and I don't find that love has an age. I know a lot of you may blame me for this like he did but yeah.


       

Eva

January 06, 2015 @ (the netherlands)

Tags: sad breakup, betrayal


I was together with my boyfriend for almost 11 months. I was struggling with sepression? But he always assured be that i loved me for who i was. A day before we went on holiday together he said he wanted to talk. He said that he felt trapped and he wsnted to be single again still, he wanted to go on holiday with me, because maybe he would change his mind. When we came back from our holiday, he broke up with me anyway. He said he wanted to stay friends, and i was kind of okay with that. A week after we broke up, he said he had to talk with me again. I asked him what was wrong, amd he told me he got together with my best friend (!!!) because he wanted to know what it was like to be with her instead of me. I have never felt so betrayed. And even though he did this to me, i still love him to pieces and would get back with him any second.


       

Henry

February 28, 2014 @ (Kerman, CA)

Tags: Bad break up


So I'm a guy, and I was in a gay relationship for 1 year and 8 months. It was like the perfect relationship, and I was so in love. It was my first time in a relationship and it started May of 2012 up until now. There were never really any signs that their was something wrong with us. We were always happy and loving to each other. When he moved to another state communication was hard. It was Arkansas, and I was in California. He was planning on staying over there and not coming back, but he only stayed there for only about a month because he feel into a depression and came back to be with me. We were good up until there was problems with his family and him, this was in December 2013. One day he took me to the place where we first fell for each other and told me he's going to have to move back to Arkansas because he can't take the drama here. I was sad knowing he was going to leave back again. Then when the day came on January 3 2014, he was packing all his stuff and was getting ready to leave. I told him to be with me in his room alone, and surprised him with a new cell phone so we could contact each other. He cried a lot and said thank you so much, you know my family would've never done this for me. The he hugged me for a long time crying. When he left i felt depressed, knowing he might just stay over there this time. A month later he facetimed me for the first time and we where so happy to see each other, we would text each other through facebook daily and that kept my calm. A week before valentines day i sent him a card that I personally made with all are pictures on it... Then he called two days later like normally but I screwed up the conversation. I got awkward about a topic and I wasn't talking the whole time on the phone. Then he suddenly hung up. I called him back and told him, you hung up.. And he said, yeah I did.. I said, are you made at me.. He said well what do u think, you know I hate it when you don't say anything on the phone.. So I asked, do u still want to talk to me?.. He said, not really.. I said, ok I'm sorry i really am.. He said, it's ok I'm over it already.. I'll talk to you tomorrow. The next day I got a msg from him.. It hurt me. He said, ok, yesterday u left me thinking on how long Ive been without you and managed to be fine. So I'm sorry, I don't love you anymore and before you start with that no i can do better stuff just think and be an adult. Your a great guy with a lot of love and the person who loves u is lucky, but I don't love u. I have to put my own goals first. So yeah I guess this is goodbye. It's over. I was so sad and couldn't think right.. I was left with no talk from him in a few days, we talked but it was nothing like we would normally talk to each other.. Then a week passed with no talking, and then yesterday the 27 of February, his best friend from here came to my house to facetime him, I let them talk by themselves but I called his friend over to talk to me real quick. I told here to put the earphones on but don't plug them in.. He told her to put in earphones so nobody would hear what he was about to say. So she put them on but didn't plug them in and I was secretly on the side of her, but he didn't know. He said to her through facetime, ok, I don't have a lot of time but that guy me and josh we broke up. He was pulling that whole act that Henry did and i was like been there done that, I don't know what we are, I think we're just friends but now I'll stick to school I guess. But when I'm 18, I'll try a few dates every now and then....... After I heard that whole thing I was heart broken. To know that he dated someone 3 days after we broke up made me feel like shit, I felt like I didn't matter i felt like I was nothing. How can u go into a relationship real quick after breaking up a almost 2 year relationship.. I doesn't make sense, his friend told him a heard everything and he was like in shock because he didn't want me to know. I talked to him later that day just us two. I asked him if that whole time that we facetimed and before when he was crying and about to move.. If he still loved? me that whole time. He said no, he had no feelings for me and he was just being nice and didn't know how to break it to me. So we just ended it for good and that was that. I feel betrayed, lost, confused, depressed.. I don't know how I'll get over my first love, my everything. I built a foundation for us, only for me having to take it down... It's hard. We have had so many loving memories in my home town it's hard not to think about it.. I go to the place where we felt for each other, it hurts. But I feel close to him when I'm there. I still love him. I can't hate him because he showed me many things in life, basically helped me out A LOT. But i do hate his poor choices and the people that might of influenced him to go in a relationship after ours. I thank and love him for being there when I needed him there, he's my best friend and the only person that gets me like no one else. He told me we can't be friends because I still have feelings for him. He said once i loose those feelings and find someone else, we can be friends. I probably won't hear from him in a long time because he's deactivating everything he's on, like Facebook.etc. if i do find someone else, I'll probably have feelings for him still.. And would have to lie that I don't. I don't know how to manage now.. It's really hard to deal with and I find myself crying constantly. The term that I always used,(Always


       

Shabda

February 07, 2014 @ (India)

Tags: bad break ups


Hey!!!
I want to share my story just to ease some pain...You know the worst part is when you have no one around you to share your feelings.....
I am from a typical Indian family.A girl who has always loved her parents more than anything in her life. Wanted to be with them always, take care of them. Infact I had decided that I'm never going to marry anyone ever.So, I never allowed myself to have any soft corner for anyone. I was happy but then someday I got a message from some old batchmate of mine on Facebook. Gradually we started chatting, sharing thoughts, jokes, started talking on phone and literally got addicted to each other. I started considering him as my best friend. He has always been real nice to me, always convinced me that one day I will find someone who will accept myself with all my responsibilities and will respect and love my parents like his own. And then after 6 months the day came when he proposed me. I was already having a hint of this from the past couple of days. I really liked him but had never thought about him like that because we had same gotra (we Indians are prohibited to marry someone with same gotra) . I never wanted to disclose my feelings to him but also didn't want to hurt him with a 'NO', So I told him this all gotra thing and convinced him to just be friends. But with time we just got drifted away and started living in an illusion that something will happen and we will be together in future...Decided that we will convince our parents and will marry with their permission....Started planning our lives together, fully committed, making all the promises to be together till the end, never realizing that they were all just dreams...We were madly, deeply in love. We completely accepted eachother as husband and wife...I was sure of one thing that it was not physical attraction though he was no less than Prince charming...I mean how could it be ...We haven't met each other for the last 7 years...
Time passed....We were so in love... I had never realized that this much love existed on earth. Even the feeling of having him with me made me so comfortable, cozy, relaxed...I felt so complete with him.....I never even required to say what I was feeling,,,we just not needed any words to express each other...
Then one day somehow my parents found out about us....I told them how much I love him and also assured them that I will never do anything without their permission....They were so mad at me...They said straight forward NO just because I being a female was having higher education that him...There was a big emotional drama......I tried my best to convince them but all in vain......And finally asked me to choose between them and him...This was even before I could tell them about gotra thing.....After all this I realized one thing that they are never going to accept us and if I somehow force them to or do something on my own, he will never get the respect he deserves....I love him but I respect him more.....I just can't bear this fact that my family don't respect my husband.....So, I broke up with him...Told him that they think that we will have ego clashes in future....He hates me for this...I know...Infact I hate myself too for this.....I feel so sorry that I couldn'd keep all the promises we made.....Everytime I think about this it feels like something cuts me from inside.....I know in this relationship it was me who was unfair.....It's been long time since we broke up but still every night I silently weep thinking about him...I still love him and miss him so much.....He was my first and last love......I know I will never be able to feel the same way again.....I am all broken.....People says that time heals all the wounds but in my case I feel like this pain is increasing day by day....This regret, this pain is my punishment.....And now I myself don't want to let it go...At least in this way he is with me....I know that I can never have him back but still wait for him forever.....And if some day I got to know about his marriage I will be the first person to be happy for him,,,at least he has moved on....


       

Lyn

January 23, 2014 @ (New york)

Tags: Bad break up, I still love him, First love


Our relationship was totally unexpected. Last september 2013, a guy that I had a teeny tiny bit of a crush asked me out unexpectedly. No clues, No everything. Out of shock, I started freaking out. I don't know what to do. My mind screamed no, but heart says yes! The reson why i don't want to go on is because im scared of my mom. Like really. She's the definition of a really strict mom. i was scared but then a thought crossed my mind.

Why not accept this? Everything happens for a reason right?

That's when I said Yes. For the first 2 weeks it was amazing. The sparks, the giddy butterflies in my tummy were there until my mom found out about him. It was horrifying. My mom was in range. My mom threatened me to talk to him in school. I was scared. I told her that I promise to break up witj. So I did. I explained to him everything. After a day, things were back together. We decided to mend things back together. I mean we aren't officially dating but you know what I mean? You can sense that something's still going on? Yup, that's it. October came, he stole my first kiss. It was magical. All I could ever think about is that I love him. That everything revolves around him. Its like he's my world. He's my strength yet he is also my weakness. Everything in him is just perfect. The way he surprises me with kisses.. The way he brought Gatorade just for me (Gatorade is my favorite drink, i just love that shit lol)
It was perfect. Everything was perfect. There are even times when he makes silly jokes or I took glances at him in class and im like 'shit, I love this guy' I was soo inlove. It was just.. Perfect. I never been so happy in my life. Everytime I woke up he's all I ever think about. He's cute 'Good Morning's'.. It made me cry, thinking about all those happy memories.
When christmas break came, he told me that his wifi router got broken.. Me, being the understanding girl that I am, understands him. I told him it was okay that he shouldn't worry about me.

(We talk and chat in Kik. We can't text since my mom checks my phone all the time)

One time, back at christmas break.. I was looking at my chat box in facebook but Something totally made me stop in my tracks. He was online. And he was usinh he's phone. I messaged him, i did everything but noo, he wouldn't reply anymore.. I don't know why. Christmas eve came, I kept on looking at my phone hoping that maybe he'd greet me a merry christmas but no, nothing came. It broke my heart. But one thing crossed my mind. I was like 'oh maybe he's wifi router is still destroyed'

New year came, I was waiting. Waiting for him to atleast greet me but no, nothing still came. It hurt me. It Crushed me .. to millions of pieces. But there's one thing that made me ball my eyes out.. He's close friend messaged me in facebook. He's like;

Happy new year __ ! How are you and him? I hope that this year is going to be a big blast for both of you. Best wishes. Haha don't forget im one of your #1 Fans of LYN! hahaha cx

That totally made me cry. I mean out of everything why that? Why his friend.? Its really heartbreaking to know that he's friend greeted me, while him? No. There was no effort. It crushed me. The way his friend says he want us to be good this year. It break me.

School came along, i tried not to approch him. Waiting for him to atleast apologize or say Hi, or ask me how my christmas break went but nothing. He never did. It crushed me. The next day, I tried talking to him but he was distant like he really is. He's bestfriend approached me and told me he wanted to talk. I listened. He's bestfriend told me the truth. He met a girl back at christmas break. He went to the movies with her and ate in a restaurant. It killed me. I was paralyzed in my seat. My breathing hitched. My face paled. My mind went blank. I felt like crying but my tears wouldn't fall. My eyes feel numb. My skin is on fire. I feel like someone just throwed me a bucket of lava. Just like that. It crushed me. I've lost weight. Im not the happy girl like before. Every recess or lunch, I don't mingle with my friends anymore. I just stay in the classroom, facing the wall, got my phone out and stay there till' its over. It crushed me. I'm not the bubble person that I am before. But you know what hurt me the most? He acted as if I never exist. It was like I was invinsible. That he couldn't see me. Just like that. There are times that I break down in class. I just couldn't help it. He looks soo happy without me. Huge smile in his face. And well, I also think that he has a crush on this girl.. He craves for her attention. He sits with her all the time in class. He talk about her all the time. I don't know what to do. Its killing me since we are classmates. I could see him everyday. Its hard to ignore him. It really is. It broke my heart. he is the love of my life. He's my everything. He's the only reason why I smile. Its hard. I mean he is after all my first love. My first ever boyfriend. My first kiss. It hurt me to know that another that I love, would leave me again. Like my dad. He left me. I mean sure, I got to see him and everything but it isn't like before. My dad has another daugther who is my half sister. My dad loves her so much. He wouldn't even bother to talk to me anymore. He wouldn't crave for our communication. When me and my dad's girlfriend fight, he always take her side. It kills me. Another guy who I love would leave me again. Wow, What did I do to deserve this? It kills me. Its almost a month now but im still not over him. He's all I could ever think about. I don't know what to do. I want the real me to be back again, but it wouldn't. Its hard to smile. He looks soo soo happy without me. It break me into millions of pieces. It made me realize that love is shitload of bullshit. I honestly don't believe in love anymore. I mean why? No matter how loving or caring that person is to you, they will break you in the end. Those people out there that are experiencing heartbreak, don't worry. Your not the only one. Im trying my hardest to stay strong. Let's just believe in ourself, have faith in God. And never say never


       

Broken Hearted Girl...

December 19, 2013 @ (Philadelphia )

Tags: Sad


When I first saw him I was stunned he was so sexy and tall with braids .... we starting talking but then something stupid happened and we stopped. We wound up in the same school and started talking again then eventually dating ... I knew instantly he was someone special .. we soon fell in love and things were going well ... but he had many secrets and he lied multiple times .... over and over and over ... he still thinks to this day that I believe all the lies he too but I just let him believe .. so we were on and off and I just kept going back because I really love him ... but I guess it just wasn't ment to be :( I still love him to this day but we don't really talk any more .. I git kicked out of my school so I don't see him any more ... it hurts really badly and I want him back ... I don't understand why though ... I want to know how he feels ... or at least how he felt ... I wish he knew :(


       

Edan

March 29, 2013 @ (san diego)

Tags: ?


My boyfriend of 1 year broke up with me and I am devastated . This was my first relationship and I feel an immense heartache. I feel I'm to blame because of my anger and distrust when he didn't give me a reason to. People say he'll come back but I highly doubt it. It hurts everyday and its barely been a week. I know he wants nothing to do with me. I feel like this feeling will never go away. Everything reminds me of him. I still love him. If he loved me, where did that love go? Or was it never love. If I could turn back time I would because I'm filled with regret, sadness and regret. What hurts more is he's already moving on. Love sucks.


       

Jordyn

October 19, 2012 @ (California )

Tags: Breakup long term relationship


I was in a relationship since September of 2009 and it just ended recently, not to long ago, in May 2012.
I was confused, lost, in denial, anger. And I still am, it's been really hard.
I really thought he was the one, well I still do.
Me and him did everything together, I saw him everyday until late night and he would spend the night on the weekends quite often.
We went out a lot to the movies, the beach, Disneyland, and new places every weekend. He took me out to dinner almost every weekend, he did anything to make me happy.
We always spoke about the future, college, getting married, having kids, growing old together.
I just don't know what went wrong. One day, he suddenly wanted to break up because he is 'not ready to commit' and wasn't aware of the seriousness of our relationship - after 2 years, he finally decides he was too young to be in such a serious relationship.
And the worst of all, he never ever said anything about being unhappy with me until the day he broke up with me. He was hiding all his feelings from me, while I was being honest with him all along.
I just don't understand. To me, our love felt real. Like really real. I honestly feel like he is the one, still today after 5 months of being broken up. I still love him, I will always love him. He never did anything bad to me. He treated me like a princess, he was my best friend. We had so many good laughs and memories together. We were practically married. We were so comfortable with each other. Every one of our friends thought we were going to actually get married and when they heard that we broke up - they thought that I was the one who did it, but incidentally it was the other way around.
Every one thought he would never leave me, that he was so in love with me. And I thought so too, and I felt secure with him because I thought he was one of those rare guys who actually stays committed in a relationship. But I guess I was wrong.
It's just so hard, I'm trying to let go. But I think about him everyday, he was the only happiness in my life. Now I'm trying to find my own happiness, and I have managed. But nothing makes me as happy as he did. I loved him more than anything, more than my family. I know it was wrong of me, but it was true. He was my first priority and I was his. I never treated him badly, I never cheated on him, or anything. I loved him with my whole heart and soul and this is what I get in return? A broken heart.
I just wonder if he ever thinks about me. I wonder if he misses me.
Oh and we don't speak. Well atleast, he doesn't talk to me. From what I have heard is that he hates me because he realized that he missed out on life because of me ('life' referring to parties and drinking and what not). So he hates me because he didn't get to experience life the way he wanted to. Which is stupid because he knew what kind of relationship he was getting into since day 1. It took him two years to realize that he was missing out on life? We weren't missing out on life, I mean we didn't party like the way he does. Instead, we went on dates to new places every weekend. We had movie nights, dinner dates, etc etc. I mean we weren't a boring couple, we were always doing something. But I guess he just want to party and get smashed or something. Well that's what he's doing now from what I've been hearing.
I hope one day he realizes that he messed up, I hope one day he realiZes how wonderful our relationship was. I hope one day we can be friends again. I just miss him so much, and I know it's not good. I feel like I'm missing a part of me. And I know time heals all wounds, it has definitely been a bumpy ride in the last 5 months, some good and some bad times but I try to stay optimistic about the future.
Any advice?